Mackenzie Stewart is a talented human.
She's a seven-year veteran of Canada's national bobsled unit. The 5-foot-11, 170-pounder is built to handle the explosive demands of her sport with the same aplomb she displayed as part of Simon Fraser University's track and field team. Stewart can also walk on her hands, though that doesn't directly help her drive a 300-pound sled down an icy track.
The Sunshine Coast native and frequent Whistler visitor has other kinds of gifts too. She's working towards a master's degree in psychology and can often be found drawing or crafting. Her latest side hustle, creating press-on nails, is one of many odd jobs on her resume: from selling Lululemon apparel to making real estate videos.
Strong in body and bright of mind, yet the most exceptional thing about this athlete could well be the resilience of her heart.
'At peace with myself'
Four years ago, a male teammate sexually assaulted Stewart in the ostensible comfort of her own home. In an eloquent and remarkably raw blog post on her personal website, she wrote: "I knew deep down that something was wrong, that this was not what I wanted, but my body was frozen, disconnected from my own will … I was raped.
"Society ingrains in [women] the importance of being nice, of not causing harm, and it twisted my thoughts. Maybe it was my fault, I wondered. If only I hadn't been drinking, if I had been more sober, perhaps I could have been clearer when I said 'no,' maybe I would have locked my door behind me. I desperately tried to convince myself that maybe he didn't realize the impact of his actions and that he didn't mean to hurt me."
The following morning, Stewart tried with equal desperation to hide from her internal tempest of trauma—but to no avail.
She grappled with daily life. The once-familiar national training facility became a house of horrors, and regular social interactions detonated minefields of emotional unrest. Her physical prowess declined precipitously, and a posterior tibial tendon tear added injury to insult by wiping out what would have been her 2022 Olympic campaign.
At one point a "fearless little girl" who believed herself invincible, Stewart wanted to quit. There appeared to be no light at the end of the tunnel, just a black hole of ever-increasing despair. Yet she found it within herself to march on as loved ones began to rally her away from the band-aid "solutions" of alcohol and adrenaline.
Then, an individual close to Stewart disclosed their own experience as a sexual assault victim.
"That lit a fire inside of me: people needed to know [what happened]," Stewart said. "The fact that this person didn't know they could turn to me and find comfort in me was devastating. I wanted to help them, so my way of helping was to come out with my story, take ownership of it and be better."
Stewart's newfound resolve coincided with a valuable career opportunity. She'd begun her career as a brakewoman, but transitioned fully in 2022 to the sport's more glamorous role of pilot. It was in that front seat she discovered liberation, for she could control her own race—and her own destiny.
Understand one thing: psychological scars remain despite time, professional counselling and love from friends and family. However, the awesome forces of grace and absolution continue to drive this woman.
"I did a lot of work over the last two years to not necessarily move on … but to give myself grace and no longer associate the negative stigmas [of sexual assault] with me," Stewart revealed. "I forgave myself for what I thought was my fault, and I don't even think I find anger and blame in the other person.
"I want to believe that people make mistakes. That's maybe naive, but I think it's helped me get through—trying to find a positive and not see society or people in a dark light. I still have days where I feel pain or feel like I lost something … but I do think that I'm at peace with myself."
Coming out strong
Sport hasn't just enabled Stewart to heal. It has also taught her how to market herself, speak in public and respond to the unexpected. The 28-year-old was always athletic, but needed time to find her long-term niche.
She wasn't meant to go pro in her childhood activities of basketball, horseback riding, soccer or volleyball. Her skills in high jump and shot put were notable, but insufficient to advance her past the collegiate level.
Alan, her dad, recommended bobsled. Stewart's ironic knee-jerk response: "I'm not going to do a winter sport. I don't know how to do winter sports. We grew up [in Pender Harbour], there's no mountains."
Weeks later, a British Columbia Bobsleigh and Skeleton Association (BCBSA) staff member reached out. That brought Stewart to her first recruitment camp, though she didn't enjoy her maiden voyage down track—instead likening it to an unpleasant roller coaster ride.
However, something about those G-forces enticed Stewart to continue. She loved riding a horse in full gallop as a kid, and grew to thrive on the edge of discomfort.
Speaking of uncomfortable situations: every Canadian bobsledder is funding his or her own way through the 2024-25 season. Even after digging deep into her savings, Stewart doesn't have enough to cover her $88,000 in projected expenses and is hustling to make more money.
The Sunshine Coast resident's go-getter attitude is emblematic of her vocation. Most bobsledders outside of powerhouse Germany must commit hundreds of hours to fundraising in addition to thousands more hours spent training and maintaining equipment away from the limelight. They race because they love to, not because of financial gain or exposure.
"I don't want to take a year off the track. It doesn't make sense," remarked Stewart. "I want Canada to come out strong at [the 2026 Winter Olympics] and have a shot at medals."
Ladies face an additional hurdle: opportunity. They are only allowed to compete in pilot-only monobobs and two-woman sleds, as opposed to men who race in two- and four-person vehicles. This practice substantially reduces the number of women who can participate in any given event.
'Leave the doors open'
Stewart has been making the most of her ice time, though. She and Leah Walkeden upset their more widely heralded compatriots for victory at last November's Canadian Championships, and roughly a week after that she notched monobob bronze during North American Cup (NAC) action in Whistler.
Lots of people are happy to see it, including Bobsleigh Canada Skeleton (BCS) coach and Olympic gold medallist Justin Kripps who named Stewart's Canadian Championship breakthrough as an achievement that stood out to him.
Walkeden now pushes Melissa Lotholz, who finished top-12 at each of the last two Olympics. Nonetheless she credits Stewart with helping her rediscover a passion for bobsleigh amidst a difficult time in life.
For her part, Stewart will continue to grind away on the NAC circuit as both a lone pilot and with teammate Morgan Ramsay in her backseat.
"[I always tell myself]: leave the doors open. It's not giving up, it's finding a new path," she said. "There's always going to be another path that gets you to where you want to go, and the goal may change … that's fine. Do what makes you feel purposeful in the moment, and if it changes, jump on the next opportunity that arises. I want to inspire as many kids as I can, so going into schools and talking about that is just as big a piece of the goal as going to the Olympic Games."
To her fellow sexual assault survivors, Stewart writes: "Each person possesses their toolbox in life, and I consider myself fortunate to have the tools that help shape my journey towards healing. However, no toolbox is inherently right or wrong, and we must refrain from judging others based on how they cope and react to such events.
"We must acknowledge that countless individuals don’t make it through their own battles. If you're reading this and it strikes a nerve, resonates with you, or makes you feel less alone, I encourage you to reach out to me or someone you trust. Allow yourself to reclaim your life, build a support system of people you trust, and embark on the healing journey you deserve. It's not fair, and it's not right. We can't change the past, but we can take hold of our future."
